turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
