we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize