whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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