Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
