He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
