ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Everclear isn't food dammit
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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