Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I just cut my nipple shaving
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
