i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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