I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
