I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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