what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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