I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
