singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
