Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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