are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
