Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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