You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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