I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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