GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
