She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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