i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
