so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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