walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
