She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm sobbing to NWA
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