addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He shit in the fireplace
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
