I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
