I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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