Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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