STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
