Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
