we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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