I wish I could punch you in the face.
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
