Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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