we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
