We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
