it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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