the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
It's just like the Real World with babies
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
