i can't believe i had my finger in that
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
