I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
