You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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