one two three fourrrrnication!
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
