I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You brought string cheese to the strip club
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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