I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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