is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
