I'm really into asian looking animals
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
