He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
