i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
