I want to walk on stilts...naked
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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