i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
