32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Randomize
